Dorothy May Hoffman

Dorothy May Hoffman was born in Ellwood City, Pennsylvania.  She proudly informed people that Ellwood City was located about 10 miles from Beaver Falls, PA, the hometown of Joe Namath. Like everyone who writes about their loved ones at times like this, Dorothy was an incredible inspiration to the lives of her children, grandchildren, and we would like to think – the many friends and co-workers who have so kindly shared pictures and stories of Mom since her passing.  But it is not appropriate just to say Mom was an inspiration, we believe it is important to tell you a little more about why we feel Mom was such an inspiration in our lives.   Dorothy’s life as a child growing up in Ellwood City, PA was challenging, beginning with the loss of her mother at the age 8.  She looked up to, and loved, her older sister, Betty, but grew up with a large stepfamily that did not leave Mom with a lot of positive childhood memories.   After graduating from Lincoln High School in Ellwood City, Mom took her Civil Service exams, and qualified for an administrative position at the United States Department of the Navy in Washington, D.C., living in a small apartment with three other young women.  Mom was an administrative assistant for a Senior Naval Officer in charge of Ordinance.  Mom had a security clearance, and often could be found roaming the halls of the Pentagon delivering important “Classified” documents to other Naval Officers of the time.  Mom fondly relayed stories of going to Washington, D.C. nightclubs and seeing the likes of “Little Richard”, “The Platters”, and other 1950’s performers who would go on to fame and fortune.  It was during Mom’s time in Washington, DC that she met our father, Ron Hoffman, a strapping young Naval Petty Officer from Carter Lake, IA.  He swept Mom off her feet, and convinced her to leave her work at the Naval Department , returning with Dad to Omaha, Nebraska, where she remained until her passing.   Mom faced many challenges during the six decades of life that followed – none of which came from any of her three children, though! ߘʂ  Mom attacked each challenge, e.g., learning to drive a car in her late 40’s, going back to full-time work after spending 25 years as a homemaker raising her children, overcoming radiation and chemotherapy treatments for throat cancer, and just dealing with the physical challenges life handed Mom the last 5 – 10 years of her life.  We watched Mom overcome every one of these challenges with great resilience until last week, when God called her into the game from the Bull Pen!    No matter what challenge Mom faced, she seldom missed a sporting event or other activity relating to her children or grandchildren.  Mom enjoyed her trips to Baltimore, Las Vegas, New York City, and yes, even Fremont, NE!  Mom was trying to find the softball field Shari was playing at, but somehow, she ended up in Fremont!  From what we recall Mom saying, she enjoyed her time in Fremont before safely finding her way home before the age of GPS and smart phone apps!  Finally, Mom also enjoyed many out of town trips with her Mutual of Omaha co-worker friends to places like Pella, IA , Amana Colonies and Worlds of Fun in Kansas City.  It is at the latter that a co-worker recently sent pictures of a drenched Dorothy who thought she had outsmarted her co-workers by refusing to ride along in the cart on a water ride.  She chose to stand on a bridge over the ride and was drenched when her co-workers cart came down the slide into the water at the bottom.  Mom finally fulfilled one of her “Bucket List” items – to take a Hot Air Balloon ride.  There is video of this venture which one day we may share with America’s Funniest Video’s – and it will stand a good chance of being a Winning Video!   For 25-plus years, Mom cherished attending monthly (3 ^rd Tuesday) lunch dates with her long-time closest friends, Jo, Shirley, Sandy and Marceil.  Others joining them included, Joyce, Martie, Gwen, Judy, Peggy, Clo and Ro.  When Mom had to stop driving, Jo, Shirley and Sandy often brought lunch to Mom’s house…and later, visited her at Bickford Assisted Living, spoiling her with cookies – Mom liked her cookies!   Mom was also an amazing slow-pitch softball pitcher well into her 50’s. Assuming that she will find a team in Heaven in need of her pitching and hitting prowess, we offer a respectful word of warning to God - If He is playing the outfield, He better not move in too far, because Mom will likely hit the ball over His head, like she did so many times during her softball games on Earth. Like everything she did for her family and friends, Mom “ hit it out of the park! ” , The family of Dorothy Hoffman would like to extend our sincere “Thanks” to all the health care workers who helped Mom during this difficult year.  We also “Thank” Jenny Trebold at Oasis Senior Advisors for helping the family make Mom’s transition to Assisted Living a smooth one – and finally, to the Administration and Staff of Bickford Assisted Living for making the last six of Mom’s life a comfortable one.  The loving care she received truly made her feel special and will be forever appreciated!   Given the challenges we all face today in our lives, with COVID-19 and the turbulent times in our Country, and abroad, we are sharing, with permission, parts of a piece simply called  “Resilience”, written recently for employees by Mutual of Omaha’s Chief Medical Officer.  After describing the struggles experienced by his parents moving from India to America in 1965, he offers some advice that immediately brings us to thoughts of Mom, and the “Resilience” she demonstrated for her children and grandchildren to learn from and guide their lives for the future.  We hope you enjoy!   “ We’re in uncertain times, likely more than many of us have experienced previously.  As some of you know, my father passed away a couple of years ago, and often find myself wishing I could have a conversation with him to ask for his advice on how to handle the challenges we face today….and I realize that there are a few things he’s told me over the years that have helped me personally build resilience.  In sharing them with you, my hope is that they’ll help in a small way.

1. Do your duty. The concept of duty is everywhere in Indian culture.  What this means is to focus on the responsibilities at hand – the things that give you purpose and meaning – to the best of your ability, and with full focus and heart.  Friends, family, neighbors and community, and work benefit from your service.  Help those in need.  Do so without expecting anything in return, or with any expectation of a particular outcome…just do your best.  You’ll find that it focuses the mind, as when you are “in the zone,” draws you towards things that really matter, and opens you up for gratitude when it seems like gratitude is hard to find.

2. Be present in the moment. Even without a pandemic, the amount of information coming at us creates a lot of turbulence for us mentally, drawing our attention in one direction in one moment and the opposite the next, pulling our emotions with it.  This creates a lot of anxiety and interferes with our ability to see clearly .  While the past and the future are things we should consider, it’s important to not dwell on them. The past has already occurred and can’t be changed, and the future hasn’t happened yet – fear over something that hasn’t yet happened is damaging.  The fact is that the current moment is the only moment in which you can make a difference.  Be mindful – don’t be somewhere else while it passes you by.  Don’t miss the beauty of the moment and the opportunity it presents.

3. Be adaptable. There are things that are central to who you are and what you want to achieve.  There are also those things that we think are central but are really not. Be clear about the essentials, and don’t get overly attached to the rest – let this part go with the flow. A lot of misery can come from wanting things to be different than they actually are, from not accepting the reality of a situation, from not opening up other doors that might lead to a new way forward.

4. Cultivate health. Elite athletes know that human performance builds through cycles of intense activity followed by recovery.  The same is true for the rest of us too.  Think about your day in terms of periods of intense activity and design time for recovery to eat well, exercise, sleep, and read.  Take time off regularly as well.

Uncertainty can be challenging.  From my father’s example, through cultivating resilience, we can prepare ourselves to live and lead well on the journey ahead .”   Love was one of the few resources that Dorothy Hoffman, our loving mother, grandmother and great-grandmother, had in abundance.  She willingly shared these resources with her family and friends – and we, her family, are thankful that so many of you have shared your love and respect for Mom, with the family these past few days! We Love You Very Much, Mom!  Rest in Peace...You have earned it! Graveside Service Saturday 10:00 AM at Evergreen Memorial Park 2300 S 78th Street Omaha, NE. Memorials to Nebraska Humane Society.